Wish List 1

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Just When

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As I should have

"It's so inconceivable, inconceivable that life was so senseless and disgusting. And if it was so disgusting and senseless, why should I have to die, and die in agony? Something must be wrong. Perhaps I did not live as I should have," it suddenly occurred to him. "But how could that be when I did everything one is supposed to?" he replied and immediately dismissed the one solution to the enigma of life and death, considering it utterly impossible...."
-excerpt from The Death of Ivan Ilyich by Leo Tolstoy

Owning yourself

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself."

— Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche
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We are

     We are the music-makers,
    And we are the dreamers of dreams,
    Wandering by lone sea-breakers,
    And sitting by desolate streams;
    World-losers and world-forsakers,
    On whom the pale moon gleams:
    Yet we are the movers and shakers
    Of the world for ever, it seems.

    With wonderful deathless ditties
    We build up the world's great cities,
    And out of a fabulous story
    We fashion an empire's glory:
    One man with a dream, at pleasure,
    Shall go forth and conquer a crown;
    And three with a new song's measure
    Can trample an empire down.

    We, in the ages lying
    In the buried past of the earth,
    Built Nineveh with our sighing,
    And Babel itself with our mirth;
    And o'erthrew them with prophesying
    To the old of the new world's worth;
    For each age is a dream that is dying,
    Or one that is coming to birth.

-Ode by Arthur O'Shaughnessy

At this very moment, I feel.

"Everyone, at some point in their lives, wakes up in the middle of the night with the feeling that they are all alone in the world, and that nobody loves them now and that nobody will ever love them, and that they will never have a decent night's sleep again and will spend their lives wandering blearily around a loveless landscape, hoping desperately that their circumstances will improve, but suspecting, in their heart of hearts, that they will remain unloved forever. The best thing to do in these circumstances is to wake somebody else up, so that they can feel this way, too."

—excerpt from Horseradish: Bitter Truths You Can't Avoid by Lemony Snicket

The end of the week

as seen on flickr image uploaded by celestephotography. all rights reserved

Thoughts

as seen on flickr; image by star of the sea
all rights reserved

Perfect

I creep in when your back's turned, leave my unfinished food on the table. To show you that perfect appetizers and 3 course meals can't change what you've done.

-written by me on September 23rd 2009-

Lately, I've been feeling really boring.
I'm reluctant to write anything for fear that it would be atrociously boring so instead here I go posting entries that I wrote months ago and pictures and quotes that I find on the internet.

I am merely the dissenting voice

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Lose your mind

as seen on flickr image by incorrigible dreamer

My favorite things #1

This site is amazing/beautiful/fantastic/one of my new favorite things.
Have a look: (non-breaking space).

image by nbsp; as seen on flickr and (non-breaking space);

P.S. A quote that I submitted appeared on Quote Book yesterday. Click here if you want to read it.

P.P.S. The quote is from the novel The Unbearable Lightness of Being by Milan Kundera in case you were wondering.

Where's that somewhere else?

"It's not about you. It's not you that they're looking at. It's not about you. I'm on top of that. I understand that...Because, if you let it be about you, then you're screwed, you know? So you have to stay separate from what's happening and you have to be somewhere else. But I don't know where that somewhere else is, you know? Or how to do that."
--from the film GIA

I wish I knew.

That's what happens with me

Joel: I can’t see anything that I don’t like about you.
Clementine: But you will! You will. You know, you will think of things. And I’ll get bored with you and feel trapped because that’s what happens with me.
Joel: Okay.
--from the film Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

Gone

And then she said that one day she would leave and they wouldn't even notice, they wouldn't even miss her but that didn't matter because she'd be far away by then, some place where she was happy. I just looked down at my feet and told her that leaving won't make the pain go away. I waited for her to say something but when I looked up she was gone.
-written by me on September 3rd-

One day

One day soon I will walk out, journal in hand, fingers marked with black ink and I will smile.

I won't hide these words anymore.
I won't tuck them under books and pretend that they're just notes.
I won't glance around, worrying, terrified that someone saw me writing.
I will be proud and shameless.
These words will be my own, they will speak my truth.
And finally the outside will match the inside.

A new month

(via) Originally Posted at iLove

An old month ends.
A new month begins and I hope that it will be better than the last.